“Me” time could be the best hours you give not only yourself but also your children!
~ Sue Atkins
Being a mum is a wonderfully fulfilling, rewarding and joyful experience. But it can also be an exhausting, frustrating and overwhelming business too.
As a mum you are often the lynchpin of your whole family. If you are tired, stressed and snappy chances are your whole family is tense, as they take their lead from you and pick up on your vibes.
So, how do you get the balance right between being selfless and exhausted to being upbeat and enthusiastic?
One of the first things I encourage mums to do, is to remember what they enjoyed doing before they had kids. As this releases positive happy memories and helps relax you. Was it sitting down with a cup of coffee and a magazine for half an hour, going to a film with your partner, or having a bubble bath with your favourite fragrance and a scented candle?
This will help to tap you back into what makes you smile, relax and feel nurtured. As a mum you are often so busy looking after, and nurturing others, that you neglect your own needs and start to run on empty.
It’s really important to look after yourself first because then you are in better shape emotionally, physically and mentally to look after your family positively.
That’s why on planes they drop your mask first so you can then help your child!
I hereby grant you permission to BANISH THE BIG GUILT GREMLIN!
Looking after yourself and nurturing yourself is one of the key ingredients of being a great parent and a brilliant mum.
Let go of being the perfect parent. Being a perfectionist is unrealistic and exhausting and it also denies your child the broader experience of others contributing to their lives and doing things in different way.
One of the quickest ways to alleviate the feelings of overwhelm is to delegate jobs around the house.
Young children love to help and can start by laying the table or putting their toys away. Teenagers can bring down their washing and can in fact turn on the washing machine if you show them (as they are the most technically advanced kids of their generation!) and partners really can load up the dishwasher if they know it makes you smile more!
It’s about being open and confident about asking and also expecting your family to be a team willing to pull together to help each other.
So grab a pen and paper to just brainstorm all the jobs you currently do that could be shared out amongst your family and jot them down.
Nurturing your needs, giving yourself “time out” and “me time” is a vital part of respecting yourself and valuing your very important role as a mum.
So make a date with yourself and a commitment to making a couple of small changes to look after yourself and watch your confidence, enthusiasm and happiness flourish..and your family will too.
p.s Do you like the way my friend Lori McDonough drew in my “Raising Happy Children for Dummies” book into the picture she drew for me ? 🙂