I’ve been preparing and going over my talk on reducing stress called “STOP Worrying – START Dancing” for talk I am giving to a group of women in London next week and it got me pondering about the negative nature of stress and it reminded me of a Destructive Dragon that needs slaying.
I know first hand all about stress as I used to be a Deputy Head in a really excellent, vibrant and successful school in Surrey as well as juggling my own family of young children.
Then I hit it again when I was establishing myself as a Parent Coach and writer and came upon all the juggling of writing books to deadlines, coaching clients, running my Parenting Made Easy Workshops and setting up distribution for my CDS and Toolkits, as well as changing light bulbs, answering the phone and helping my kids with their homework and doing school runs.
I was stressed as it was a HUGE learning curve!
I had what Paul McKenna describes as “Busy – holism” or “Busy- itis”
Stress – the number one enemy
I realise that I had became addicted to the buzz from the stress chemicals – if I wasn’t writing my own articles, recording CDs or networking I was avidly reading books about online marketing, Search Engine Optimisation or blogging.
I couldn’t switch off and didn’t realise I was addicted to the buzz of doing…….even on holiday I would bring all my self development books and was so driven that I didn’t want to just sit around – I wanted to busy water skiing or scuba diving.
I was addicted to the busy –ness – building my business, striving to be successful, aiming for perfection…….
But as my husband likes to say “life is a marathon not a sprint” and our bodies work best when we shine brightly for a short burst – then rest, recover and recuperate.
It builds stamina, long term strength and longevity.
All peak performers from Usain Bolt to Serena Williams need to rest, recover and re-balance and renew their energy.
From building in recovery time, fun time, and “me” time I learnt to relax……. and the more relaxed I became – the better I felt and the more efficient I became!
Being more relaxed meant I got more done in less time!
So build in daydreaming, power naps or bite sized down time – don’t just reach for the chocolate, chips, coffee or glass of wine to give you a quick fix.
Start to remember this little technique that I call “Slaying The Dragon” and take back control of your stress and your life so you can have more FUN !
Everyone has stress – and a certain amount of stress creates the adrenalin and drive you need to get things done, but too much results in sleepless nights, tummy aches, headaches, bad moods, shouting at others, and tension.
In fact did you know that nearly 50% of all the people that doctors see have problems that are stress related?
BUT…… it doesn’t have to be like this!
The techniques I use I learnt from my training with Dr. Richard Bandler and they will simply help you to feel completely back in control of your life, and will lead to better health, a better immune system, happier relationships and a more fulfilling life.
So it’s about showing you how to create better pictures in your mind and better voices in your head and helping you feel more relaxed, positive and at ease.
The key is to find a balance so you can deal with any difficult situations with confidence, knowing you have some tried and tested techniques up your sleeve to help you.
Stress is like trying to run a race with a huge ball and chain round your ankle. It can be done – but boy is it hard work !
The problem is that people get used to living with stress – it can be a very hectic, fast paced world out there – with deadlines, meetings and kids but if you are not careful you are on a treadmill like a hamster on a wheel and it takes a wakeup call, like my friend Nicky’s “funny turn” or “mini epileptic fit” to jump off, re assess and make a few changes.
Or in my own case the death of my Dad, followed very closely by the death of my Mum, when I was a Deputy Head, to tip me over the edge into re assessing what I was doing and where I was going.
Remember Life is a marathon not a sprint.
You need time to recover, replenish and recuperate after a hard run.
Take that time – it will make you come back stronger, more refreshed, more energised and more raring to go – achieving even more in less time and with less effort.
For me the changes don’t have to be huge ….. but they do have to CONSISTENT.
You like me know, that being stressed leads to bad moods, bad hair days, silly mistakes, sense of humour failure, tummy aches, headaches, bumping into things or dropping them, car accidents, depression, anxiety, shouting at your kids and even physical illnesses.
So, one simple way to look at stress is to see it as a fire alarm.
Notice when it goes off – notice what triggers it (as they are warning signs) and pay attention to the alarm sounds, feelings and flashing lights and learn to respond to them in new and more empowering ways.
It’s about learning to re- set, re- programme get in control of your fire alarm.
I have developed a 10 step stress busting eliminator system called Slaying the Dragon and if you’d like me to come and give a talk at your business, school or parenting group I’d be delighted so just give me a call on 01342 833355 and I’ll pop along in my little red mini to teach you it !
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About the author
Sue Atkins is a Parenting Expert who offers practical guidance for bringing up happy, confident, well behaved children. She is also the author of “Raising Happy Children for Dummies” one in the famous black and yellow series published worldwide and the highly acclaimed Parenting Made Easy CDs. She regularly appears on BBC Breakfast and The Jeremy Vine Show on BBC Radio 2 and her parenting articles are published all over the world.
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Sue Atkins the Parenting Expert
T: + 44 1342 833355 M: 07740 622769
Surrey RH7 6LF